Gender Stereotypes Feat. Yusuf and Sana!

According to our Chinese friends, the Chinese view men as having a higher status than women. The proof is, only men are allowed to go to the mosque/masjid (unfortunately). This is quite unheard of in Malaysia. We understand that the mosque is open to everyone, rich and poor, male and female, Muslim and non-Muslim... So, we asked them...

Us: Why (can't women enter mosques)?
Yusuf & Sana: We don't know!

Haha. It is even puzzling to them!

Additionally, man is the sole provider for the girlfriend/wife, the breadwinner, the pillar. The women do not have to worry financially at all. So, Yusuf jokes, he is "very rich because he does not have a girlfriend" to spend on. Haha!

Hofstede's 5 Dimensions Model: Masculinity in Focus

(source)

The Masculinity is relatively higher in China than in Malaysia, which explains the socially-influenced roles for men (breadwinner) and women (being motherly). We further compared the situation in Malaysia. Before marriage, it is up to the couple to spend lavishly on each other or not. Some equally divide the costs. Yusuf and Sana perceive this as 'equality' and they are somewhat intrigue by the idea.

Since women are not allowed in mosques in China, we were wondering where Muslim couples get married (nikkah). Yes, in Malaysia, some do it at home, but it is also customary to do so at the mosque. It turns out that in China, the imam will come to the bride and bridegroom's home to perform the ritual -- not much difference there with Malaysia.

As you have understood, men is in charge of the finance of the household. But the one who knows how to take care of things in the household tend to be the mother/wife, who is highly demanded by the children. Sana added that in most cases, the children will not ask help from the father in the mother's absence, unless when asking the whereabouts of the mother. Hahaha!

Personally, we think that belief is universal.

Stereotyping and Its Flaws

Based on my experience, Malaysians usually have this stereotype that people who try to speak English with an accent not their own are show-offs, hence, bashed most of the time. My brother used to speak English with a Scottish accent whenever he spoke with me before he went off to Scotland and at first I knew he was faking it and he sounded so weird, but the fact was after he settled off there for about 3 years now, he came back and spoke the same English-Scottish, and surprisingly he sounded legitimately real. It is to say here that, he has actually adapted to the culture there with his original culture subconsciously so, it made me think that by faking it, he practiced it and made him reach this point. As his little sister, I earnestly vow not to underestimate him (and his previous accent attempts) anymore. 

- Shai

I have had an enlightening experience collaborating with some Japanese friends from Kansai University. Coincidentally, it was themed 'stereotypes on Islam and/or Malaysia from the mass media'. As anticipated, some of them find Islam intimidating and somewhat rigid, with the...

• controversial IS issue
• obligation of hijab on women (even in sunny Malaysia!)
• praying five times daily 
• and most of all, the no alcohol (yes, that includes sake and mirin) and no pork rule (a staple in Japanese cuisine), among others. 

The negative images of our culture/beliefs did sadden us, but on the bright side, we had an opportunity to help neutralize them. Therefore, we had produced response videos to their intellectual conundrums. If you're up to it, here's our 11 minute video on the Muslim prayers.

All in all, the collaboration allowed me to see Islam from another's eyes, as well as the fact that stereotypes made by any mass media, should be verified through our own research that will inshaAllah lead to the truth. By knowing the truth, we can avoid intercultural miscommunication. 

- Afia

What inspired us to share our own experiences on stereotyping and its sins, you ask? Why don't you watch this talk given by this well-spoken, diversely-cultured Italian-British-Norwegian expatriate to find out the answer? (grins)

Good day, sir!